Begin with the End in Mind

Thoughts on 160 days of quarantine.

 

2. Begin with the End in Mind

Quick Summary:

Start with a clear destination in mind. Covey says we can use our imagination to develop a vision of what we want to become and use our conscience to decide what values will guide us.

Most of us find it rather easy to busy ourselves. We work hard to achieve victories -- promotions, higher income, more recognition. But we don't often stop to evaluate the meaning behind this busyness, behind these victories -- we don't ask ourselves if these things that we focus on so intently are what really matter to us.

Habit 2 suggests that, in everything we do, we should begin with the end in mind. Start with a clear destination. That way, we can make sure the steps we're taking are in the right direction.

“It’s incredibly easy to get caught up in an activity trap, in the busyness of life, to work harder and harder at climbing the ladder of success only to discover that it’s leaning against the wrong wall.” Stephen Covey, author  

Beginning with the end in mind is also extremely important for businesses. Being a manager is about optimizing for efficiency. But being a leader is about setting the right strategic vision for your organization in the first place, and asking, "What are we trying to accomplish?"

Before we as individuals or organizations can start setting and achieving goals, we must be able to identify our values. This process may involve some rescripting to be able to assert our own personal values.

Rescripting, Covey explains, is recognizing ineffective scripts that have been written for you, and changing those scripts by proactively writing new ones that are built of your own values.

It is also important to identify our center. Whatever is at the center of our life will be the source of our security, guidance, wisdom, and power.

You might be a spouse-centered if your feelings of security are based on the way your spouse treats you; your direction comes from your own needs /wants and those of your spouse.

 You might be family-centered if your security is founded on family acceptance & fulfilling family expectations; your actions are limited by family models and traditions. 

 You might be money-centered if your personal worth; profit is your decision=making criteria.

 You might be work centered if you tend to define yourself by your occupational role; you make your decisions based on the needs and expectations of your work. 

You might be possessions centered if your security is based on your reputation, your social status, or the tangible things you possess; you tend to compare what you have to what others have.

You might be pleasure-centered if you make decisions based on what will give you the most pleasure; you see the world in terms of what’s in it for you. 

You might be friend-centered if your security is a function of the social mirror; you are highly dependent on the opinions of others. 

You might be enemy-centered if you make decisions based on what will thwart your enemy; you are defensive, over-reactive, and often paranoid.

You might be church-centered if your security is based on church activity and the esteem in which you are held by those in authority or influence in the Church; you find identity and security in religious and comparisons.

You might be self-centered if your security is constantly changing and shifting; you view the world by how decisions, events, or circumstances will affect you. 

Our centers affect us fundamentally -- they determine our daily decisions, actions, and motivations, as well as our interpretation of events.

However, Covey notes that none of these centers are optimal and that instead, we should strive to be principle-centered. We should identify the timeless, unchanging principles by which we must live our lives. This will give us the guidance that we need to align our behaviors with our beliefs and values.

Key Lessons:

Challenge yourself to test the principle of beginning with the end in mind by doing the following:

1. Visualize in rich detail your own funeral. Who is there? What are they saying about you? About how you lived your life? About the relationships you had? What do you want them to say? Think about how your priorities would change if you only had 30 more days to live. Start living by these priorities.

2. Break down different roles in your life -- whether professional, personal, or community -- and list three to five goals you want to achieve for each.

3. Define what scares you. Public speaking? Critical feedback after writing a book? Write down the worst-case scenario for your biggest fear, then visualize how you'll handle this situation. Write down exactly how you'll handle it.

This is why goals are important. 

Con amor,

Vero

 

Be Proactive

Thoughts on 159 days of quarantine. 

 

Habit one 

 

1. Be Proactive

Quick Summary:

We're in charge. We choose the scripts by which to live our lives. Use this self-awareness to be proactive and take responsibility for your choices.

The first habit that Covey discusses is being proactive. What distinguishes us as humans from all other animals is our inherent ability to examine our own character, to decide how to view ourselves and our situations, and to control our own effectiveness.

Put simply, in order to be effective one must be proactive.

Reactive people take a passive stance -- they believe the world is happening to them. They say things like:

·      "There's nothing I can do."

·      "That's just the way I am."

They think the problem is "out there" -- but that thought is the problem. Reactivity becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and reactive people feel increasingly victimized and out of control.

Proactive people, however, recognize they have responsibility -- or "response-ability," which Covey defines as the ability to choose how you will respond to a given stimulus or situation.

In order to be proactive, we must focus on the Circle of Influence that lies within our Circle of Concern-- in other words, we must work on the things we can do something about.

 

The positive energy we exert will cause our Circle of Influence to expand.

Reactive people, on the other hand, focus on things that are in their Circle of Concern but not in their Circle of Influence, which leads to blaming external factors, emanating negative energy, and causing their Circle of Influence to shrink.

Key Lessons:

Challenge yourself to test the principle of proactivity by doing the following:

1. Start replacing reactive language with proactive language.

Reactive = "He makes me so mad."
Proactive = "I control my own feelings."

2. Convert reactive tasks into proactive ones.

 I love his take of how we are all in charge of our lives. In the free world, we make our own choices. It's a natural law and right for every human and that is the reason why I don't like Communism.

Con amor,

Vero

The 7 Habits

Thoughts on 158 days of quarantine. 

 

People on Facebook are posting favorite books they have read over the years. I have read so many books that I don’t think I could pick just 20 but I do remember the first self-help book I read years ago by a master teacher, Steven Covey. The 7 Habits ofHighly Effective Peopleis a self -improvement book. It is written on Covey’s belief that the way we see the world is entirely based on our own perceptions.

 

In order to change a given situation, we must change ourselves, and in order to change ourselves, we must be able to change our perception. Who on earth does not remember the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People? We all want to succeed.  And one path to success is identifying the habits that can help us on our journey. What habits do highly effective people have? I have been listening his books with my mom on audible. She loves them! This week, I will go over what the book is about.

 

The books opens with an explanation of how many individuals who have achieved a high degree of outward success still find themselves struggling with an inner need for developing personal effectiveness and growing healthy relationships with other people. 

 

Covey believes the way we see the world is entirely based on our own perceptions. In order to change a given situation, we must change ourselves, and in order to change ourselves, we must be able to change our perceptions. 

 

In studying over 200 years of literature on the concept of success, Cove identified a very important change in the way that humans have defined success over time. 

 

In earlier times, the foundation of success rested upon character ethic (things like integrity, humility, fidelity, temperance, courage, justice, patience, industry, simplicity, modesty, and the Golden Rule.) But starting around 1920s, the way people viewed success shifter to what Covey calls, “personality ethic” (Where success is a function of personality, public image, attitudes, and behaviors.)

These days people look for quick fixes. They see a successful person, team, or organization and ask, “How do you do it? Teach me your technique? But these “shortcuts” that we look for, hoping to save time and effort and still achieve the desired result, are simply band-aids that will yield short term solutions. They don’t address the underlying condition. 

 

The way we see the problem is the problem. Covey writes. We must allow ourselves to undergo paradigm shifts to change ourselves fundamentally and not just after our attitudes and behaviors on the surface level. In order to achieve true change. 

 

That’s where the seven habits of highly effective people come in.

Habits 1, 2, and 3 are focused on self-mastery and moving from dependence to independence. 

 

Habits 4, 5, and 6 are focused on developing teamwork, collaboration and communication skills, and moving from independence to interdependence. 

 

Habit 7 is focused on continuous growth and improvement and embodies all the other habits. 

 

I even attended one of his workshops when I bought my first Franklin Covey Day-planner. They came in three sizes so I decided to get the biggest one of course. It was not too convenient to carry so it became more like my journal. Later I bought a more convenient middle size and each year around December I would get the inserts to use the next year. Those day-planners have been replaced by smartphones but the Covey’s teachings remain forever. 

 

Con amor,

Vero

Sunday Sermon: The Cycle of Pride

Thoughts on 157 days of quarantine.

When we lived in the Dominican Republic, Elder Wilford Andersen was the Seventy over the Caribbean Area. Daniel and Elder Andersen worked together in all the Church’s affairs, both temporal and spiritual. 

We lived in the same apartment complex, went to the same ward and often had dinner together. We were invited to participate in almost anything they planned because they were inclusive. When He gave his talk to the BYU students, we knew exactly what he was going to talk about because we had heard it before. He did a good job explaining the cycle of pride. Here is what he said: 

 “It has been said that a good talk will always comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable. As you listen this morning, you might consider which of those two applies to you. If my message accomplishes either of these two results, I will feel it has been worthwhile. I have prayed that the Holy Ghost will carry my words to your hearts and that you will then apply them in a way that will bless your lives.

There is a prevalent pattern of behavior in the Book of Mormon commonly referred to as “the pride cycle.” It is repeated so frequently that one begins to sense that the Lord and His prophets are trying to teach us something important—that perhaps its inclusion in the record is meant to be a warning from the Lord to each of us in our day.

Pride is a serious sin. In fact, in the book of Proverbs we read that it is number one on the list of seven deadly sins that the Lord hates.¹ Using a clock as a metaphor, let’s say that the pride cycle begins at twelve o’clock—the pinnacle of pride. When we are at twelve o’clock on the pride cycle, we, like the Nephites of old, feel so successful, so intelligent, and so popular that we begin to feel invincible. We enjoy it when others compliment us on our successes, and we are irritated when others around us receive compliments on their successes. At twelve o’clock we tend not to listen to the counsel of others. We don’t need others. Sadly, we often conclude that we don’t even need God or His servants. We bristle at their counsel. We are doing just fine on our own. We forget or we reject what King Benjamin taught: that we “are eternally indebted to [our] heavenly Father, to render to him all that [we] have and are.”²

Our modern-day prophets have warned us against unrighteous pride. President Ezra Taft Benson called it “the universal sin” and “the great stumbling block to Zion.”³ President Dieter F. Uchtdorf compared pride to “a personal Rameumptom, a holy stand that justifies envy, greed, and vanity.”⁴However you define pride, its consequences are always the same. It alienates us from God. It pushes us around the pride cycle to two o’clock, where we offend the Spirit of the Holy Ghost.

Initially we may think that offending the Spirit of the Holy Ghost is inconsequential. Nephi described it as being “lull[ed] . . . away into carnal security. . . . All is well in Zion [we think]; yea, Zion prospereth, all is well.”⁵ Interestingly, at two o’clock on the pride cycle, if we are honest with ourselves, we really are not that happy. We have this gnawing sense that we are slipping. We try to fight back against the uncomfortable currents of the pride cycle. We cling to the memories of past successes and insist on putting our trust in the arm of flesh. This is a serious mistake.

Jesus taught that you and I are like branches that depend on the vine for nourishment. “I am the vine,” He taught, “ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.”⁶ When we offend the Spirit, we cut ourselves off from the very source of all spiritual nourishment, and it is just a matter of time until we begin to wilt. Without the help of the Lord and the influence of the Spirit, the gravitational pull of the pride cycle drags us down toward four o’clock failure.

The Lord taught Joseph Smith:

For although a man may . . . have power to do many mighty works, yet if he boasts in his own strength, and sets at naught the counsels of God, and follows after the dictates of his own will and carnal desires, he must fall.⁷

We can choose our conduct, but we cannot choose the consequences of our conduct. At four o’clock on the pride cycle, we experience the painful consequences of our foolish pride. We may lose the job. We may lose the girlfriend or the boyfriend. We may lose the respect of those who matter most to us. Worse yet, we may lose respect for ourselves. Time has a way of relegating the most important among us from the list of Who’s Who to the list of Who’s He? or Who’s She? And at four o’clock we come face to face with our own inadequacies. Like Moses, we realize that we are not so important after all, “which thing [we] never had supposed.”⁸

The great English poet Percy Bysshe Shelley wrote a thought-provoking poem entitled “Ozymandias,” in which he told of “a traveler from an antique land” who happened upon the ancient remains of a once-imposing stone statue. All that remained of the statue were two “trunkless legs,” a shattered, half-buried head, and a pedestal with an inscription that read:

“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!”
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away.⁹

Failures and afflictions are not happy thoughts for any of us, but, ironically, we often find that they are great blessings because they tend to push us on around the pride cycle toward six o’clock humility. Our journey from four o’clock failure to six o’clock humility can be strangely exhilarating. We begin to lose our pretensions. We are no longer trying to impress those around us. We begin to see things more clearly and more honestly. We are more comfortable with criticism and can smile at our own mistakes and weaknesses.

At six o’clock on the pride cycle, it is not, as one Christian author has observed, that we think less of ourselves but rather that we think of ourselves less.10 The British writer G. K. Chesterton described the transition brilliantly when he wrote:

How much larger your life would be if your self could become smaller in it. . . . You would break out of this tiny and tawdry theatre in which your own little plot is always being played, and you would find yourself under a freer sky, in a street full of splendid strangers.¹¹

At six o’clock on the pride cycle, we become truly humble. We also become meek. Humility and meekness are foundational principles of the gospel. We speak often of the great triumvirate of Christian virtues: faith, hope, and charity. But the prophet Mormon suggested that there is a fourth virtue that makes possible the other three. He taught:

And again, behold I say unto you that he cannot have faith and hope, save he shall be meek, and lowly of heart.

If so, his faith and hope is vain, for none is acceptable before God, save the meek and lowly in heart; and if a man be meek and lowly in heart, and confesses by the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, he must needs have charity.¹²

Another scriptural attribute often associated with six o’clock humility is submissiveness. King Benjamin taught that the natural man is an enemy to God and will be forever and ever unless he becomes as a little “child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.”¹³

We can learn much about humility and meekness from little children. They seem to spend much of their little lives at six o’clock on the cycle. They are comfortable there. No wonder the Lord teaches us that in order to come into His presence, we must become as little children.

One of our sons and his wife were struggling with contention and disunity among their children in their home. After counseling together, they decided that pride was the cause. They held a family council on the matter with their children and determined together that humility is what the children needed to eliminate the contention and disunity. To help their children remember to be kind, my son and daughter-in-law placed a chair in the corner of the kitchen and designated it as “the humility chair.” When a child misbehaved or became upset, they would invite him to sit in the humility chair for a while until he could reflect and recalibrate. Then he could rejoin society whenever he was ready.

The humility chair worked as they had hoped it would. One day after our son had returned from a long, hard day at work and had displayed some impatience with several of the children, who were yelling and running through the house, one of his little daughters looked at him and said, “Papa, you need to sit in the humility chair”—which he did. He reflected, recalibrated, and rejoined society when he was ready.

Each of us would be wise to designate a humility chair—if not in the corner of the kitchen, perhaps in the corner of our minds and hearts—where we can recalibrate and remember our dependence on the Lord. Partaking of the sacrament each week provides just such an opportunity.

We should not make the mistake, however, of confusing meekness with weakness. It has been said that meekness is not a recognition of our weakness but rather a recognition of the true source of our strength. There is nothing weak about meek. It is just that when we are humble and meek, we don’t elevate ourselves; we elevate God.

David, the young shepherd boy, was sent by his father to deliver food to his older brothers who were fighting the Philistines in the Valley of Elah. When David got to the Israelite camp and learned of the challenge from the giant Goliath, he offered to represent the armies of Israel and fight the giant himself. While his brothers ridiculed him, David meekly explained to King Saul that “the Lord that delivered me out of the paw of the lion, and out of the paw of the bear, he will deliver me out of the hand of this Philistine.”

Something in David’s meek demeanor must have impressed King Saul, because he responded, “Go, and the Lord be with thee.”¹⁴

So David confronted the giant, who was furious that the Israelites would send a shepherd boy to fight him. He called out to David:

Come to me, and I will give thy flesh unto the fowls of the air, and to the beasts of the field.

Then said David to the Philistine, Thou comest to me with a sword, and with a spear, and with a shield: but I come to thee in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom thou hast defied.

This day will the Lord deliver thee into mine hand.¹⁵

Then, with a sling and one small stone, the meek shepherd boy, David, killed the proud giant Goliath.

You and I live in a society in which humility and meekness seem almost counterintuitive. Trash talk, power politics, and end-zone victory dances are celebrated while noiseless devotion to God is increasingly ignored and even at times belittled. But let us never forget, brothers and sisters, that humility and meekness are required if we wish to continue our progress around the cycle.

At six o’clock on the pride cycle, when we are truly humble and meek, we turn back to God because there is often nowhere else to turn. Our hearts are now broken and our spirits are contrite. The world defines “broken hearted” as being overcome by grief or despair—something to be avoided if at all possible. But in the scriptures, having a broken heart is a peaceful and hopeful condition and ultimately a prerequisite to eternal glory.

Consider this perspective on what it means to have a broken heart. To break a horse is to train a horse how to be ridden. A broken horse accepts the saddle strapped to its back, the reins placed around its head with the bit in its mouth, and a rider in the saddle. A broken horse has learned through experience how to obey and be responsive to the guidance given by the rider. Only then can a horse be useful and productive. And so it is with a broken heart; a broken heart is one that has been trained through experience to be obedient and responsive to the commands of the Master. Only with a broken heart can we be truly useful and productive in the Lord’s service.

At six o’clock we yield our broken hearts to God, and because we are humble, the Lord begins to “lead [us] by the hand, and give [us] answer to [our] prayers.”¹⁶ With His guidance, we continue around the pride cycle toward eight o’clock, when we invite the Spirit of the Holy Ghost into our lives once again.

The Spirit’s influence changes our hearts. Like the people of King Mosiah, “we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually.”¹⁷ We begin to keep God’s commandments, and He begins to pour down His blessings upon us—blessings that He has always desired to give us, for that is His nature, but that we refused to receive because of our foolish pride. We begin to receive blessings because we are now obeying the laws upon which they are predicated. We pay our tithing, and the Lord opens the windows of heaven and pours down so many blessings that we cannot receive them all.

Our humble obedience to the commandments powers our progress around the pride cycle toward ten o’clock, when we find ourselves in a state of blessed happiness. We experience success. It should not surprise us; it is a scriptural promise:

And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual.¹⁸

Ten o’clock on the pride cycle is a pleasant and wonderful place to be, but unfortunately it is also a very dangerous place to be. Our associates begin to pat us on the back and to compliment us for all our successes. Unfortunately, we begin to believe them. When I was called to serve as a General Authority, President Uchtdorf reminded me of some timely advice he had received at the time of his call.

“Brother Andersen,” I was told, “as a General Authority, people will be very kind to you. They will compliment you on your service and tell you how much they like your conference talks. But when they do, just don’t inhale.”

Compliments can be like a drug. If we are not careful, they can cloud our judgment and create in us an ungodly desire for more and more praise and credit. And if our friends don’t give us the credit we so richly deserve, we risk rotator cuff injury from trying to pat ourselves on the back. Like our ancient adversary, we whisper to ourselves that we deserve the credit, for surely we have done it.

And thus we can behold how false, and also the unsteadiness of the hearts of the children of men; yea, we can see that the Lord in his great infinite goodness doth bless and prosper those who put their trust in him.

Yea, and we may see at the very time when he doth prosper his people, yea, in the increase of their fields, their flocks and their herds, and in gold, and in silver, and in all manner of precious things of every kind and art; . . . yea, and in fine, doing all things for the welfare and happiness of his people; yea, then is the time that they do harden their hearts, and do forget the Lord their God, and do trample under their feet the Holy One—yea, and this because of their ease, and their exceedingly great prosperity.¹⁹

Slowly—and without fully realizing it—we once again approach the twelve o’clock pinnacle of pride, so busy looking around for accolades that we fail to look ahead at the precipitous fall that awaits us. For “pride [always] goeth . . . before a fall.”²⁰ And so the incessant cycle continues.

Brothers and sisters, let’s be honest. Most of us, like the Nephites of old, have ourselves taken a few laps around the pride cycle. I used to wonder how the Nephite nation could run the entire cycle in a period of as short as five years. I have since come to believe that we can run the cycle in five years and we can run it in five minutes. It is a pernicious pattern of thinking and behavior that permeates our society. It is so common that it sometimes becomes hard to recognize.

Are we consigned to continue forever in this endless do-loop of despair? Is there no way to get off the pride cycle? There is. In fact, there are two points on the pride cycle where we can exit—one to our eternal destruction and the other to our everlasting happiness.

At four o’clock, when we are facing failure or affliction and feel like all is lost, if instead of becoming humble we become angry; if we lose hope or give in to self-pity; or if we begin to blame others—including God—for our misfortune, then we will exit the pride cycle. But we will exit downward to destruction, as did the Nephites of old.

But at ten o’clock, when it seems like we can do no wrong, when all is going well, if instead of becoming proud we become thankful, then we will exit the pride cycle. But this time we will exit upward toward God. To exit the pride cycle at ten o’clock, we must recognize that every blessing we receive comes from Heavenly Father. He is the source of all that is good in our lives—the fount of every blessing. We must embrace King Benjamin’s teaching that we “all depend upon the same Being, even God, for all the substance which we have, for both food and raiment, and for gold, and for silver, and for all the riches which we have of every kind.”²¹

A successful ten-o’clock escape from the power­ful pull of the pride cycle is not easy, but it is possible. We have a few examples in the Nephite record to prove it. Consider this one from Alma 62:

But notwithstanding their riches, or their strength, or their prosperity, they were not lifted up in the pride of their eyes; neither were they slow to remember the Lord their God; but they did humble themselves exceedingly before him.

Yea, they did remember how great things the Lord had done for them, that he had delivered them from death, and from bonds, and from prisons, and from all manner of afflictions, and he had delivered them out of the hands of their enemies.

And they did pray unto the Lord their God continually, insomuch that the Lord did bless them, according to his word, so that they did wax strong and prosper in the land.²²

As we speak, each of us likely finds himself or herself somewhere on the pride cycle. Where are you? If you are at four o’clock, if it feels like all is lost and you are a total failure, don’t despair. You are in a good place. Avoid blaming others for your failure. Humbly turn to God and recognize your dependency on Him.

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.²³

The gravitational pull of the pride cycle will draw you on around to a brighter future.

But if you are at ten o’clock, basking in the false light of success, be careful. Avoid the tendency to turn inward and become prideful. “Count your many blessings; name them one by one.”²⁴ Follow the scriptural counsel to remember all that the Lord has done for you. As the sacramental prayer reminds us, we must remember Him not for an hour or two but always.²⁵ We must not take Him or His sacrifice for granted. We must not fail to thank Him for each and every blessing.

The story is told of an elderly grandmother who was walking along the seashore with her little grandson when a giant wave swept in, picked up her grandson, and carried him out to sea.

The grandmother looked up to heaven and cried, “Lord, how could you do this to me? I pay my tithing, I fast once each month, and I live the Word of Wisdom.”

Before the grandmother could say amen, another giant wave swept in and delivered her grandson at her feet. She looked down at the boy, then up to heaven, and said, “Wait! He had a hat.”

Recognize that all good things come from God. He is the source of every blessing you receive. Fill your heart with gratitude for His merciful kindness. Treasure and follow the counsel of His servants. Your gratitude will inoculate you against pride and make a way for your escape from the pride cycle.

Brothers and sisters, you are important to the kingdom of God. You are the hope of Israel, Zion’s army, the children of the promised day. Please be wise. May we each heed the prophetic warning of the Nephite pride cycle.²⁶ In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.’

Elder Andersen treated Daniel with respect, he saw Daniel as his counselor. I will always appreciate his friendship and kindness toward us. 

Con amor,

Vero

A Farmer Knows How Life Grows

Thoughts on 156 days of quarantine.

 

I keep a collection of my favorite poems and stories. Here is one done by our very own daughter on a day I was feeling a little blue for no apparent reason just anxious of what is going on in this crazy world.  

 

A Farmer Knows How Life Grows

By Bianca Merkley

 

 Before rising

 A baby seed nestled in soil

 Nourished with water and gentle rays

 Seeing harsh, forgotten, thick barren ground

 Some think it will never bloom

 “Let’s pluck it out” they say

 After a short time, the farmer sees that

 Nothing appears to be growing underneath

 The seed is bad

 It can’t be growing

 But the farmer waits

 Day by day

 Until the soil breaks

 The seed sprouts

 Green shines

 The farmer knows

That change takes time

 Trust the soil, the seed, the light

 Have faith that all things

 Will work out just right

 

I could not agree more with the statement: “have faith that all things will work out just right!” 

 

Con amor,

Vero

Life is truly a blessing

Thoughts on 155 days of quarantine. 

 

“A good life is when you smile often, dream big, laugh a lot

 

and realize how blessed you are for what you have.”  

 

-unknown

 

Today when I said my morning prayer to start my day, I decided to have a conversation with heavenly Father the way I would if he was there with me as my guest of honor. I started thanking him for all my blessings I have received to date since we moved to Argentina. The prayer came from a heart full of gratitude. I did ask for things but I said in my prayer that the most important thing in my life is my family and to be an influence for good to them. 

 

While I was praying, the thought occurred to me that it would be a good idea to get a notebook to start writing down all the blessings that I can think of that have ever come into my life so they are fresh when I pray each morning.  I even wrote down this quote: “Smile today, dream big, laugh a lot, and realize you are blessed!  It is going to be a great day!” Amy Anderson

 

I am going to borrow an idea I heard on a podcast of writing a list of everything that I can think of as it comes to my mind in this notebook. My goal is to literally flood the pages with the lists of blessings I can recall.  I want to capture all of them, even the smallest blessing of finding something I have lost after saying a prayer, to meeting certain people, to having certain opportunities, to the miracles that I have had come into my life.  I am really excited to do this exercise starting today and I am going to report back to you on how it goes.   

 

My mind has already begun racing with memories even just in my planning to write it down this week.  It is amazing the things I have noticed were blessings when I first decided to start thinking about it. Once I finish my list with every memory I can possibly think of, I am going to keep the notebook by my bed so as new blessings happen in my life I can remember to add them to my list.

 

I have a feeling that one day, when my life is over, this notebook will become one of my children and grandchildren’s most precious possessions.  Just think of how meaningful it would be to you to find a notebook written like this from your own grandparents or great grandparents. Just think of the impression and influence it might have on your life.

 

Even more important, I have a feeling that this inventory book will become one of my own most valued possessions while I am still living.  I have a feeling that keeping this little book by my bed to look at on the difficult days that come will help me to keep things in perspective.  It will help to remind me that my life truly is blessed and that even though things may get difficult, there is still plenty to be grateful for.

 

I would hope anyone reading this to make the same notebook this week.  And when you finish it, maybe take some of the most meaningful items from the lists and make little notecards that you can write one on each card to hang them on your cubicle at work or tape them to your mirror at home, or put them somewhere that you when viewed they can give you a pick me up to help you stay grateful and focused on all of life’s blessings.

 

Life truly is a blessing. I stand in awe at the many blessings I have been given over the years:  my family, my friends, my life lessons…so much to be grateful for and so many more blessings still to come.

 

Con amor,

Vero

 

A Day to Remember

Thoughts on 154 days of quarantine.

 

Fifteen years ago, August 19^thBianca married the man of her dreams in the Salt Lake Temple. Bianca was a day shy from turning 20 the next day. I remember thinking how young she was. It was the most beautiful wedding imaginable. On that day, we were surrounded by family and friends, great food, fun live music, and plenty of dancing into the night at a beautiful venue in the Millcreek Canyon. It was a fairy tale wedding. One of those days you will never forget.

 

I couldn’t have been happier for Bianca and Joseph but at the same time, sadder for me, because even with all the amazing wonderful details of the weeding there was a dark secret Brad and I had been keeping that spoiled everything. You see, Brad and I had separated but we agreed in staying together until the wedding was over. All those months prior to and at the wedding were hard since we had to do a lot of pretending. 

 

We probably could have won an Oscar because no one had a clue of the turmoil going on in our personal lives. No one knew what was really happening in our soon to be broken home. It was the hardest thing I had ever felt. I remember driving in my car yelling from the top of my lungs Noooooooooooo! It was so ironic that as my daughter found her soul mate and sweetheart I was losing mine.  I was dying inside but smiling for Bianca at the same time. I still don’t know how I stayed sane when I think of that dark time in my life. 

 

Today, when I think of that experience, I see a silver lining and tender mercy to compensate for all that heart wrenching experience. I couldn’t have asked for a more amazing wedding for my daughter back in 2005 and mine in 2009. I couldn’t have asked for Bianca marrying a better man and the same goes with me. Daniel, is truly the most amazing husband and the best grandpa. I feel so blessed that we found each other and the same goes for Bianca and Joseph. Not only that but he is the most amazing example to his children and his nieces and nephews. He is such a nice uncle too and that is the biggest blessing of all. Yes, Bianca is a lucky girl for sure!! Happy Birthday Bee and Anniversary too! I love you.

Con amor,

Vero