11 habits of supremely happy people!
We’re always chasing something—be it a promotion, a new car, or
a significant other. This leads to the belief that, “When (blank) happens, I’ll
finally be happy.”
While these major events do make us happy at first, research
shows this happiness doesn’t last. A study from Northwestern University
measured the happiness levels of regular people against those who had won large
lottery prizes the year prior. The researchers were surprised to discover that
the happiness ratings of both groups were practically identical.
The mistaken
notion that major life events dictate your happiness and sadness is so
prevalent that psychologists have a name for it: impact bias.
The reality is, event-based happiness is fleeting.
Happiness is
synthetic—you either create it, or you don’t. Happiness that lasts is earned
through your habits. Supremely happy people have honed habits that maintain
their happiness day in, day out. Try out their habits, and see what they do for
you:
They slow
down to appreciate life’s little pleasures. By nature,
we fall into routines. In some ways, this is a good thing. It saves precious
brainpower and creates comfort. However, sometimes you get so caught up in your
routine that you fail to appreciate the little things in life. Happy people
know how important it is to savor the taste of their meal, revel in the amazing
conversation they just had, or even just step outside to take a deep breath of
fresh air.
They
exercise. Getting your body moving for as little as 10 minutes releases
GABA, a neurotransmitter that makes your brain feel soothed and keeps you in
control of your impulses. Happy people schedule regular exercise and follow
through on it because they know it pays huge dividends for their mood.
They spend
money on other people. Research shows that spending money
on other people makes you much happier than spending it on yourself. This is
especially true of small things that demonstrate effort, such as going out of
your way to buy your friend a book that you know they will like.
They
surround themselves with the right people. Happiness spreads through people. Surrounding yourself with happy people
builds confidence, stimulates creativity, and it’s flat-out fun. Hanging around
negative people has the opposite effect. They want people to join their pity
party so that they can feel better about themselves. Think of it this way: If a
person were smoking, would you sit there all afternoon inhaling the second-hand
smoke? You’d distance yourself, and you should do the same with negative
people.
They stay positive. Bad things happen to
everyone, including happy people. Instead of complaining about how things could
have been or should have been, happy people reflect on everything they’re
grateful for. Then they find the best solution available to the problem, tackle
it, and move on. Nothing fuels unhappiness quite like pessimism. The problem
with a pessimistic attitude, apart from the damage it does to your mood, is
that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy: if you expect bad things, you’re
more likely to experience negative events. Pessimistic thoughts are hard to
shake off until you recognize how illogical they are. Force yourself to look at
the facts, and you’ll see that things are not nearly as bad as they seem.
They get enough sleep. I’ve beaten
this one to death over the years and can’t say enough about the importance of
sleep to improving your mood, focus, and self-control. When you sleep, your
brain literally recharges, removing toxic proteins that accumulate during the
day as byproducts of normal neuronal activity. This ensures that you wake up
alert and clear-headed. Your energy, attention, and memory are all reduced when
you don’t get enough quality sleep. Sleep deprivation also raises stress
hormone levels on its own, even without a stressor present. Happy people make
sleep a priority, because it makes them feel great and they know how lousy they
feel when they’re sleep deprived.
They have deep conversations. Happy people
know that happiness and substance go hand-in-hand. They avoid gossip, small
talk, and judging others. Instead they focus on meaningful interactions. They
engage with other people on a deeper level, because they know that doing so
feels good, builds an emotional connection, and is an interesting way to learn.
They help others. Taking the time to help
people not only makes them happy, but it also makes you happy. Helping other
people gives you a surge of oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine, all of which
create good feelings. In a Harvard study, employees who helped others were 10
times more likely to be focused at work and 40% more likely to get a promotion.
The same study showed that people who consistently provided social support were
the most likely to be happy during times of high stress. As long as you make
certain that you aren’t overcommitting yourself, helping others is sure to have
a positive influence on your mood.
They make an
effort to be happy. No one wakes up feeling happy every day and
supremely happy people are no exception. They just work at it harder than
everyone else. They know how easy it is to get sucked into a routine where you
don’t monitor your emotions or actively try to be happy and positive. Happy
people constantly evaluate their moods and make decisions with their happiness in
mind.
They do
things in-person. Happy people only let technology do their
talking when absolutely necessary. The human brain is wired for in-person
interaction, so happy people will jump at the chance to drive across town to
see a friend or meet face-to-face because it makes them feel good.
They have a
growth mindset. People’s core attitudes fall into one of two categories: a fixed
mindset or a growth mindset. With a fixed mindset, you believe you are who you
are and you cannot change. This creates problems when you’re challenged,
because anything that appears to be more than you can handle is bound to make
you feel hopeless and overwhelmed. People with a growth mindset believe that
they can improve with effort. This makes them happier because they are better
at handling difficulties. They also outperform those with a fixed mindset
because they embrace challenges, treating them as opportunities to learn
something new.
Bringing It All Together
Happiness
can be tough to maintain, but investing in the right habits pays off. Adopting
even a few of the habits from this list will make a big difference in your
mood.
Con amor,
Vero
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