The grass is always greener

I recently spoke with a dear  friend who is experiencing divorce. She is a beautiful woman a little older than me with grown up children and they seemed do happy. Why, is this even happening? 

We are all familiar with “the grass is always greener” syndrome.  That syndrome that causes people to look around and think that something else would be better than what they currently have.  Most commonly you hear of people catching that syndrome in their dating or marriage relationships, although it can extend to other areas of life as well such as career or money or power or position or health etc.

 The GIAG syndrome (as I call it) is one to avoid at all costs.  It is incredibly demoralizing and destructive and it drags us down to a dark place.  It causes us to view everything from the perspective of what we have isn’t enough.  Rather than making the most of what we have, you can get easily sucked into feelings of envy and/or greed, which eventually lead to depression and feelings of never having or amounting to enough yourself.  And that is not a place where any of us should want to be.  Thankfully we have the ability to avoid it if we want to.

The best way to avoid the GIAG syndrome is simply this – WATER YOUR OWN GRASS!  It’s that easy.  Rather than spending time fanaticizing that someone else will understand you better or care for your needs more, spend that time working to improve the relationship you have.  No relationship is going to improve if you don’t put serious effort into it.  Relationships are hard, no matter how much you may love someone.  They take time and sacrifice and attention – and lots of it.  And to allow yourself to believe that some other relationship will be easier and take less effort is a pile of hooey!   There is no shortcut to having a good relationship. There is no successful “get rich quick” strategy when it comes to building a solid marriage.  And if someone single is painting the picture for you that if you were in a relationship with them that it would be so much easier, then you best run the other direction – and fast!  Run right to your own house to your own spouse…the one you made a commitment to…the one who puts up with your shortcomings and loves you in spite of them…the one who with a little bit of watering will give you the most luscious lawn ever!

“You may think the grass is greener on the other side, but if you take the time to water your own grass if would be just as green.” Today’s reminder is to not take the person you love most in the world for granted.  Stop fantasizing that someone else out there would wake up in the morning looking amazing with sparkly fresh breath and never be grumpy.  That person doesn’t exist.  But what does exist is a partner who loves you and stays with you even when you probably don’t deserve them.  What does exist is a person who is willing to walk through life by your side even when the path you’re walking on gets difficult.  Recognize how blessed you are to have that person in your life. And water the grass where he or she is standing on!!