No, Not Again!

None of us are immune from having hard times in our lives. We all struggle with one thing or another. Whether its illness, or loss of a loved one, or financial difficulty, or heartbreak, or job loss, or feeling powerless about something we hav no control over, or feelings of inadequacy…everyone struggles…  Over the past few months dealing with the pandemic I have seen people dealing with hard things in their lives. While I have hoped, I could wave a magic wand and make everything okay for them I know I can’t. But what I can do is share something that has been helpful to me when I am going through hard times. One way I try to help myself when I am struggling is to keep a file of inspirational articles on the topic of ways to navigate through life’s trials. One of my favorite articles on this topic was written by author Gail Goodwin and is called, “10 Tips To Get Through Hard Times”, which reads:

 

“Each morning as we wake up we have a choice to determine the direction of the day. We can go into default mode and wake up fearful and worried about things like how am I going to pay the bills, heal this relationship, find a job, etc… or we can make the conscious decision to choose the kind of day we’d like to experience. Many times the events of the day happen so quickly, we get caught up in the drama and we truly feel that we don’t have a choice. Things just happen. Bad things happen to good people.

 

But, even in the midst of confusion, pain or suffering, we do have a choice in our reaction to our circumstances. No matter what happens, we get to choose how to react to it. I’m the first to admit that this is often difficult to remember when life is smacking us in the face. It’s so much easier to do when we intentionally set the tone for our day BEFORE we jump into it.

 

Personally, I find that the first 15 minutes of my day is the most important part of the entire 24 hours. It’s like putting the train on the right track at the beginning of the day rather than trying to right a derailed train later.

 

Here are a few tips to help you through difficult times and help you take control of your day- before it ever begins.

 

As you wake up tomorrow morning, remind yourself of these things:

 

1. )  Don’t buy into what appears as real. You are not your problems. You are not your failures. You are a magnificent being with unlimited potential.

 

2.)  Hold the vision of what you WANT to happen, not what appears to be happening. Stay with the vision. See it, share it, feel it. Focus on what you want to bring into your life rather than what might appear to be showing up.

 

3.)  Keep the faith. When scary things happen, remember to go inside and renew your faith that everything is unfolding as it should. You are a child of God, no less than the moon and the stars. Certainly if the entire Universe works with perfection and we’re an integral part of it, then things are happening as they should for us too. Our challenge isn’t to deal with what may appear as a problem, but to find the blessing in the situation. Find the gift in what’s happening around you.

 

4.)  Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. Remember that fear is just an illusion. It’s simply energy that can be redirected to excitement, just by changing your focus.

 

5.)  Remember, this too shall pass. All things come and go. Change is the only thing that’s constant in our lives. Be open. Adapt. Know that what may appear as a mountain in front of you will soon be a molehill behind you. Knowing this too shall pass enables us to get through anything.

 

6.)  Remember your inner magnificence! You are an infinite being with unlimited potential. Seriously, when you think about it in that way, would an infinite being be afraid of anything? YOU are infinite. You are a part of something so much bigger than yourself or your problems. Tap into that greatness and put things in perspective.

 

7.)  Surround yourself with people who support you. On days that you forget your magnificence, they’ll be there to remind you of how amazing you are and help you see the beauty and possibility of life. They’ll be there to help you achieve your dreams and contribute to the world in a bigger way.

 

8.)  Realize that you are not alone. You are part of God, the Universe, a greater consciousness or whatever you may call that overpowering, loving force of Nature. You are not meant to walk alone, nor can you ever really do so. We are intertwined and are all part of one another. We are all the same. And we are walking this path together, going through the same things, learning the same lessons. Be compassionate with one another.

 

9.)  Practice gratitude. When you count your blessings a world of abundance opens unto you. And if what you focus on grows, then let it be gratitude.

 

10.)  Go do something for someone else. Start your day asking yourself, “How can I be of service?” and watch your own problems diminish. The perceived size of your problem will diminish in direct proportion to the how much you give to others. Be there for one another.”

 

Last night I was feeling down. I felt upset. I cried because I felt powerless. You see, our travel plans came to a halt because the Argentine government is shutting down the airport again so our flight from Buenos Aires to Dallas got cancelled. They are reducing their flights by 80% which means that the sooner I could leave is in August. Very discouraging! 

 

—I hope this article helps all of you as much as it has helped me to get through hard times when I am feeling down. I am trying to stay positive Keeping the faith because there is nothing we can do on those things we can’t control. 

 

Con amor,
Vero

Happiness is a choice

I just completed a scrapbook where I put in some famous quotes for the newlywed couple to adhere to and one says: Love is a choice and Happiness is a choice!

 

“Happiness is a choice”. That is the saying that a friend has on a sign on her bathroom mirror that she looks at every time she gets ready to go anywhere.  When I asked her the other day if she had a favorite saying that was her motto of sorts in life she told me it was that phrase “Happiness is a choice”.  And she is correct, it is a choice.

 

I love being around happy people. My mom is usually happy. She is just a happy woman no matter what the circumstance, she is always happy – My mom makes the choice to be happy.

 

Being happy takes making a conscious choice – you actually have to decide to make the choice to be happy – especially when things are difficult or not going exactly the way you wish they were going.  Those are the times it is the most important for you to make that conscious choice that YOU WILL BE HAPPY NOW!  I have been telling myself that I am making that choice all throughout my day today.  Whenever I start to feel my heart get heavy about the whole pandemic thing I stop and tell myself “I am making a choice to be happy” and it genuinely helps a ton!  Try it!  See for yourself.  It really does work.  And sure, I might have to repeat that a hundred times a day to myself for these first few months till we go back but that is fine!  I will repeat it as many times as I have to in order to keep my head in the right place.

 

I KNOW that happiness is a choice.  I know that every one of us has the ability to make that choice for ourselves.  So even though you can’t always choose your circumstances you can always choose to be happy in spite of them.  It takes having faith that God, or the universe, or whatever higher power you believe in, is in charge and that He wants the best for your and that so long as you do your part that everything will come into your life when it should and as it should and it will all be for your best good.  Don’t waste your time worrying about things you cannot control, or wishing you could have someone that doesn’t want you back, or wanting to keep things the same forever not wanting them to change, or trying to force things into an outcome that you think is best….stop all of that!   Let go of thinking the outcome you want has to come about for you to be happy in life.  Recognize that the outcome God has in mind for you is PERFECT and it will make you the HAPPIEST of all! Trust him and trust his timing and trust the seasons he puts into our lives.  Then remind yourself that Happiness is a Choice and choose to be happy.

 

Con amor,

Vero

Keeping our fingers crossed!

Hola chicos:

 

Happy birthday to Daniel II yesterday and happy birthday to Christopher tomorrow and with that the month of June came and went in a flash! Today also was the farewell devotional for Elder De Hoyos who received a new assignment in Salt Lake headquarters. Yesterday we had him for dinner and was telling us some amazing stories of being brave and taking a leap of faith starting with getting married. He and his girlfriend were dating when they decided to get married within one week. No party, no wedding cake, no wedding dress, nor wedding rings but they did make the trip to the nearest temple to Mesa AZ. Isn’t that amazing! We have had him to dinner every Sunday for the past three Sundays since his wife is already in Mexico taking care of family issues so he can’t wait to reunite with her next month. 

 

We can’t wait to travel too. I have been so excited about this month finally ending soon because that means we get to fly to the U.S. There is the preparation of getting our bags packed and ready to go and so much anticipation. However, for some reason I feel a little stressed out and I know when that happens because I just put a handful of M&M’s in my mouth without even thinking. 

 

I have been avoiding sweets and bread for six weeks but today I just couldn’t take it! Apparently, all flights out of Buenos Aires for today and tomorrow were cancelled. We found out because the mission Presidents were scheduled to leave tomorrow and they can’t. There are rumors that it is because there is a new decree of only allowing two fights a day into Argentina.

 

We still don’t know how this will affect our travel plans for Thursday yet but it is concerning.  All because they don’t have enough people vaccinated!!! We have two mission Presidents and one employee in critical condition and one who has passed away in Uruguay because he opted not to take the vaccine. He was considered young and healthy. It is so clear to me, the difference between going back to normal and us is the accessibly to a vaccine. Period! 

 

We will be crossing our fingers hoping that we can somehow get out! 

 

Con amor,

Vero 

 

Sunday Sermon: " I Believe"

On one occasion Jesus came upon a group arguing vehemently with His disciples. When the Savior inquired as to the cause of this contention, the father of an afflicted child stepped forward, saying he had approached Jesus’s disciples for a blessing for his son, but they were not able to provide it. With the boy still gnashing his teeth, foaming from the mouth, and thrashing on the ground in front of them, the father appealed to Jesus with what must have been last-resort desperation in his voice:

“If thou canst do any thing,” he said, “have compassion on us, and help us.

“Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.

“And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.”¹

 

This man’s initial conviction, by his own admission, is limited. But he has an urgent, emphatic desire in behalf of his only child. We are told that is good enough for a beginning. “Even if ye can no more than desire to believe,” Alma declares, “let this desire work in you, even until ye believe.”² With no other hope remaining, this father asserts what faith he has and pleads with the Savior of the world, “If thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us.”³ I can hardly read those words without weeping. The plural pronoun us is obviously used intentionally. This man is saying, in effect, “Our whole family is pleading. Our struggle never ceases. We are exhausted. Our son falls into the water. He falls into the fire. He is continually in danger, and we are continually afraid. We don’t know where else to turn. Can you help us? We will be grateful for anything—a partial blessing, a glimmer of hope, some small lifting of the burden carried by this boy’s mother every day of her life.”

 

“If thou canst do any thing,” spoken by the father, comes back to him “If thou canst believe,” spoken by the Master.⁴

“Straightway,” the scripture says—not slowly nor skeptically nor cynically but “straightway”—the father cries out in his unvarnished parental pain, “Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.” In response to new and still partial faith, Jesus heals the boy, almost literally raising him from the dead, as Mark describes the incident.⁵

 

With this tender scriptural record as a backdrop, I wish to speak directly to the young people of the Church—young in years of age or young in years of membership or young in years of faith. One way or another, that should include just about all of us.

Observation number one regarding this account is that when facing the challenge of faith, the father asserts his strength first and only then acknowledges his limitation. His initial declaration is affirmative and without hesitation: “Lord, I believe.” I would say to all who wish for more faith, remember this man! In moments of fear or doubt or troubling times, hold the ground you have already won, even if that ground is limited. In the growth we all have to experience in mortality, the spiritual equivalent of this boy’s affliction or this parent’s desperation is going to come to all of us. When those moments come and issues surface, the resolution of which is not immediately forthcoming, hold fast to what you already know and stand strong until additional knowledge comes. It was of this very incident, this specific miracle, that Jesus said, “If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.”⁶ The size of your faith or the degree of your knowledge is not the issue—it is the integrity you demonstrate toward the faith you do have and the truth you already know.

 

The second observation is a variation of the first. When problems come and questions arise, do not start your quest for faith by saying how much you do not have, leading as it were with your “unbelief.” That is like trying to stuff a turkey through the beak! Let me be clear on this point: I am not asking you to pretend to faith you do not have. I am asking you to be true to the faith you do have. Sometimes we act as if an honest declaration of doubt is a higher manifestation of moral courage than is an honest declaration of faith. It is not! So let us all remember the clear message of this scriptural account: Be as candid about your questions as you need to be; life is full of them on one subject or another. But if you and your family want to be healed, don’t let those questions stand in the way of faith working its miracle.

 

Furthermore, you have more faith than you think you do because of what the Book of Mormon calls “the greatness of the evidences.”⁷ “Ye shall know them by their fruits,” Jesus said,⁸ and the fruit of living the gospel is evident in the lives of Latter-day Saints everywhere. As Peter and John said once to an ancient audience, I say today, “We cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard,” and what we have seen and heard is that “a notable miracle hath been done” in the lives of millions of members of this Church. That cannot be denied.⁹

 

Brothers and sisters, this is a divine work in process, with the manifestations and blessings of it abounding in every direction, so please don’t hyperventilate if from time to time issues arise that need to be examined, understood, and resolved. They do and they will. In this Church, what we know will always trump what we do not know. And remember, in this world, everyone is to walk by faith.

So be kind regarding human frailty—your own as well as that of those who serve with you in a Church led by volunteer, mortal men and women. Except in the case of His only perfect Begotten Son, imperfect people are all God has ever had to work with. That must be terribly frustrating to Him, but He deals with it. So should we. And when you see imperfection, remember that the limitation is not in the divinity of the work. As one gifted writer has suggested, when the infinite fulness is poured forth, it is not the oil’s fault if there is some loss because finite vessels can’t quite contain it all.¹⁰Those finite vessels include you and me, so be patient and kind and forgiving.

Last observation: When doubt or difficulty come, do not be afraid to ask for help. If we want it as humbly and honestly as this father did, we can get it. The scriptures phrase such earnest desire as being of “real intent,” pursued “with full purpose of heart, acting no hypocrisy and no deception before God.”¹¹ I testify that in response to that kind of importuning, God will send help from both sides of the veil to strengthen our belief.

I said I was speaking to the young. I still am. A 14-year-old boy recently said to me a little hesitantly, “Brother Holland, I can’t say yet that I know the Church is true, but I believe it is.” I hugged that boy until his eyes bulged out. I told him with all the fervor of my soul that belief is a precious word, an even more precious act, and he need never apologize for “only believing.” I told him that Christ Himself said, “Be not afraid, only believe,”¹² a phrase which, by the way, carried young Gordon B. Hinckley into the mission field.¹³ I told this boy that belief was always the first step toward conviction and that the definitive articles of our collective faith forcefully reiterate the phrase “We believe.”¹⁴ And I told him how very proud I was of him for the honesty of his quest.

Now, with the advantage that nearly 60 years give me since I was a newly believing 14-year-old, I declare some things I now know. I know that God is at all times and in all ways and in all circumstances our loving, forgiving Father in Heaven. I know Jesus was His only perfect child, whose life was given lovingly by the will of both the Father and the Son for the redemption of all the rest of us who are not perfect. I know He rose from that death to live again, and because He did, you and I will also. I know that Joseph Smith, who acknowledged that he wasn’t perfect,¹⁵ was nevertheless the chosen instrument in God’s hand to restore the everlasting gospel to the earth. I also know that in doing so—particularly through translating the Book of Mormon—he has taught me more of God’s love, of Christ’s divinity, and of priesthood power than any other prophet of whom I have ever read, known, or heard in a lifetime of seeking. I know that President Thomas S. Monson, who moves devotedly and buoyantly toward the 50th anniversary of his ordination as an Apostle, is the rightful successor to that prophetic mantle today. We have seen that mantle upon him again in this conference. I know that 14 other men whom you sustain as prophets, seers, and revelators sustain him with their hands, their hearts, and their own apostolic keys.

These things I declare to you with the conviction Peter called the “more sure word of prophecy.”¹⁶ What was once a tiny seed of belief for me has grown into the tree of life, so if your faith is a little tested in this or any season, I invite you to lean on mine. I know this work is God’s very truth, and I know that only at our peril would we allow doubt or devils to sway us from its path. Hope on. Journey on. Honestly acknowledge your questions and your concerns, but first and forever fan the flame of your faith, because all things are possible to them that believe. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

 

Elder Holland GC April 2013

The Little Prince

I read my mom the Little Prince and have always wondered how is it that a little book like that has sold over 200 million copies? 

The story is very simple. The narrator, a pilot, crash-lands his plane in the Sahara desert. While he tries to repair his engine and monitor his dwindling supply of water and food, a little boy appears out of nowhere and simply asks him to draw a sheep. The author then learns that this "little prince" comes from the far away Asteroid B-612, where he left a rose and three volcanoes.

The prince’s most prized possession was the rose, but her tempestuous mien and fickleness tired him and he decided to leave his tiny planet. To his surprise, the flower was visibly sad to see him go, but she urged him on nonetheless.

Before arriving on Earth, the prince visited other planets and met with strange individuals: a king, a vain man, a drunkard, a lamplighter, and a geographer. At the geographer’s suggestion, he visited Earth but dropped down into the Sahara Desert. He found no friends there, but a snake told him that if he ever needed to return to his home planet, he could take advantage of the snake’s bite. He met a fox that taught him to realize that to know others we must “tame” them; this is what makes things and people unique. "The essential is invisible to the eye," says the fox.

The narrator grows to love and cherish the small boy, marveling at how fragile he seems though he adopts a serious air. He and the boy find a well and drink from it, which saves the narrator’s life, but he later, right as he is about to joyfully tell the prince he's fixed his engine, happens upon the prince talking to a yellow snake about poison. The plan is for the prince to reunite with his rose, but this is utterly devastating to the narrator. Nevertheless, the boy lets the snake bite him and falls over into the sand. The narrator cannot find his body the next day so he hopes that the boy is not dead.

The narrator returns to his life but always wonders about the prince and hopes he returns. He asks readers to let him know if they ever meet the prince.

That is in a nutshell what the book is about. It has a lot of symbolisms and philosophical themes but is still a simple book and probably that is the reason why it has sold so many copies to young and old. Coin sidentatly, Mandy is also reading the book via Marco Polo. With my mom, we read about the Salvadoran woman who inspired the writer to write the book in the first place.  She lived in Buenos Aires too. Both Consuelo and her husband had a colorful life, very interesting. The best part about reading the little prince was to discuss the book with my mom which makes it so worth it. 

Con amor,

Vero

Life's Little Instructions

I found a great article written by a man who was 95 at the time he wrote it with his own instructions for people on how to live their lives. I can picture Abuela Nela writing them also. Enjoy!

 

Life’s Little Instructions (given by 95 year old William Snell in 1993)

Sing in the shower.

Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.

Watch the sunrise at least once a year.

Never refuse homemade brownies.

Strive for excellence not perfection.

Plant a tree on your birthday.

Learn three clean jokes.

Return borrowed vehicles with the gas tank full.

Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.

Leave everything a little better then you found them.

Keep it simple.

Think big thoughts but relish small pleasures.

Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.

Be forgiving of yourself and others.

Say “thank you” a lot.   

Say “please” a lot.

Avoid negative people.

Wear polished shoes.

Remember other people’s birthdays.

Commit yourself to constant improvement.

Have a firm handshake.

Send lots of Valentine cards, sign them.

Look people in the eye.

Be the first to say “hello”

Return all things you borrow.

Make new friends but cherish old ones.

Keep secrets.

Plant flowers every spring.

Have a dog.

Always accept an outstretched hand.

Stop blaming others.

Take responsibility for every area of your life.

Wave at kids on school buses.

Be there when people need you.

Don’t expect life to be fair.

Never underestimate the power of love.

Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation.

Don’t be afraid to say “I made a mistake.”

Don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know.”

Compliment even small improvements.

Keep your promises no matter what.

Marry only for love.

Rekindle old friendships.

Count your blessings.

Call your mother.

And your dad too, if they happen to be alive.

 

Con amor,

Vero

Atributes to work on

After reading Love is a choice, I came up alphabetically with a list of a few attributes I need to work on myself for starters. 

 

I wonder if putting “not Easily Provoked” on my list was setting myself up for failure given that I tend to get upset easily when something irritates me too much, that being said, I am a huge fan of a reward system so I think I am going to make myself a deal and figure out prizes I can earn if I get all A’s on my report card, things like: a new purse or shoes, a new outfit to replace an old one that has been sitting in my closet for too long, Etc. 

 

A little incentive never hurt anything.  Well, except my husband’s wallet…but he must look at it this way – if I get all A’s I will be the best wife ever!  I mean just look at what I great person I would be to be married to if I can pull off getting straight A’s for everything on my list!  So yeah, that is how I plan to explain my reward system to him. 

 

Always abounding in good works

Always acknowledging God

Benevolent

Charitable

Compassionate

Diligent

Fair

Faithful

Fearless

Gentle

Graceful

Grateful

Generous

Genuine

Happy

Honest

Hopeful

Humble

Kind

Knowledgeable

Loving

Meek

Merciful

Not Easily Provoked

Optimistic

Obedient

Patient

Prayerful

Refined

Respectful

Righteous

Seek not my own 

Sincere

Thankful

Tender -hearted 

Trustworthy

Trusting of God 

Virtuous

 

Con amor,

Vero

Love is a Choice

This month pick is a book by Elder Lynn G. Robbins

Love is a choice. 

 

The overall theme of his book is that from the beginning we were given agency. We get to choose what kind of marriage we want to have. Because love is a choice, you can’t fall in love. True love is not something you fall in but grow in. True love is defined by the Savior, a.k.a. charity. One that never faileth (1 Cor. 13:8)

 

Love is more than physical attraction, in due time, it will be fatal if that is all we have going for because eventually we age. We are 100 % responsible, no excuses.

 

We must forgive even if the offender is unrepentant, and until we do so, we will not access the Lord’s grace and find healing. We need to be one. Unity and loyalty are imperative to the health of a marriage. 

 

To be happy, we must choose to do things that will increase our joy. Developing Christ’s virtues is the key to happiness.

 

At the end of the book he enlists 100 virtues with scriptural references:

 

 

1.    Self-governance

2.    Responsibility

3.    Accountability

4.    Faith in Jesus Christ

5.    Self-worth

6.    Righteous desires 

7.    Self-worth

8.    Knowledge

9.    Integrity

10. Silence and Listening

11. Love

12. Mediation

13. Discernment

14. Understanding

15. Wisdom

16. Simplicity

17. Cleanliness

18. Order

19. Balance

20. Belief

21. Trust

22. Optimism

23. Vision

24. Foresight and anticipation

25. Vigilance

26. Punctuality

27. Work

28. Independence

29. Contentment

30. Provident living

31. Creativity

32. Excellence

33. Commitment

34. Determination

35. Diligence

36. Constancy

37. Progress

38. Resilience and endurance

39. Valor

40. Moral courage

41. Boldness and candor

42. Charity

43. Compassion

44. Affection

45. Kindness

46. Friendship

47. Tenderness

48. Mindfulness and sensibility

49. Hospitality

50. Politeness and civility

51. Refinement

52. Culture

53. Vitality

54. Enthusiasm

55. Health

56. Humor

57. Joy

58. Good works

59. Generosity

60. Nurturing

61. Praise

62. Servantship

63. Rescuing

64. Diplomacy and Tact

65. Poise and serenity

66. Forgiveness

67. Long suffering

68. Patience

69. Mercy

70. Justice

71. Inclusion

72. Open-mindedness

73. Discipleship

74. Testimony

75. Example

76. Teaching

77. Honor and Respect 

78. Solemnity

79. Worship

80. Gratitude

81. Meekness

82. Humility and submissiveness

83. Repentance

84. Obedience

85. Loyalty

86. Trustworthiness

87. Sincerity

88. Integrity

89. Family

90. Unity

91. Patriotism

92. Sacrifice

93. Fasting

94. Self-mastery and Temperance

95. Modesty

96. Chastity

97. Moral purity

98. Spirituality

99. Consecration

100.Sanctification 

 

 

The invitation is to look at each of those virtues to work on them each week. 

 

Con amor,

Vero